M.I.A.

My presence on this blog might be a little scarce for a while. My new blog, HERE, is becoming a more time consuming project than I realized it was going to be. Quite honestly, I started it because many of the other contestants for Mrs. Oklahoma had one and I didn't want to look uninvolved to the judges just in case they like to do a lot of web-surfing. While I doubt that one of the questions in interview will be "And how many posts did you write on your blog this past year" I didn't want to take any chances.
I was kind of worried when I first thought about starting a blog for Mrs. Greater Edmond that I didn't have enough to blog about. I am starting it only and month and a half out from the pageant, afterall. I really didn't see myself making tons of appearances between now and then when I have a long list of things to do such as: get a spray tan, find earrings for interview, practice walking in my 4 1/2 inch heels, buy a new pair of spanx, etc.
I was envisioning posts like "well, let's see, today I did 20 crunches in order to prepare for swimsuit...." Basically, I thought I'd actually be hurting myself with a last-minute blog. But as I was writing my first post I realized.....this was the place I could have a true voice for CF. It is my platform issue and that issue is my reason for doing the pageant in the first place, so it makes sense for me to talk about it there NON-STOP. I usually try to refrain from talking someone's ear off in public about the disease, the science, the foundation because, people, I could go on FOR-EV-ER. It just isn't always the right time and place to do that. But this new blog has become that place and I feel that I have been called to this time - that this time in our journey is where I am really supposed to step it up.
I made a list and I actually have something different I want to say about CF or the CF Foundation every day until the pageant. I made myself add some other things to the list but not too many because this is what it is about for me. If I'm being true to why I'm going through this process, this is what matters above all else.
Does anyone else feel that writing their blog is like therapy? I love to write anyway but, having a place to write about our stories with this disease and its difficulties, along with the hope and excitment I feel over the medical breakthroughs going on right now, is wonderful for me. Pair that with the possibility that it might actually affect someone, or draw much needed attention to this orphan disease and I am more motivated to write than ever before.
So, I probably won't be posting about mascara or burlap over here for a while. (I'll pause while you all shed a tear). I hope you'll follow me over to the new blog and join me in my journey to make a difference....while wearing 4 1/2 inch heels.

Come on over....

and check out my new blog for Mrs. Greater Edmond! Leading up to the Mrs. Oklahoma pageant in April, I will post things about my sponsors, cystic fibrosis and the CF Foundation, my preparation for the pageant, and other random things that happen along my journey. I hope you'll check it out!
www.mrsgreateredmond2010.blogspot.com

It's just making it worse...

I go back and forth between being obsessed with craft project blogs and home decorating idea blogs. I think because we are coming into Spring I am way more interested in the latter. I tell you that once you start looking at these blogs you cannot stop! You find one cute one and you see her blogroll. So you think "Oh, I'll just look over here and see who she looks at. Here house is so cute that I'm sure the houses she looks at are cute too...". And you know what?.....I'm right. They are SO CUTE/PRETTY! The thing is, looking at one, two or even three beautifully decorated houses gives me inspiration -looking at the 15-20 I have found is just making me be totally underwhelmed and unsatisfied with my own house!!! Thus begins a very dangerous cycle. It all started with the buffet table in my kitchen dinette area. I decided I didn't like the arrangement anymore so I decided to come up with something else. Well, since I don't have a huge "blow-money-on-the-house" fund, I was going to have to pull items for the table from other places in my house. Sooooo, after getting the table looking better I then had holes all over my kitchen counters. Well, we can't have that! So I pulled things from the bathroom and living room for the counters.....You see the cycle! Anyway, in case you are like me and you love drooling over other people's houses just a dreamin' away that yours will maybe someday even slightly resemble them, I thought I'd list some of the new one's I have found for your viewing pleasure. Just don't say I didn't warn you....

320*Sycamore

Joys of Home

Imperfectly Beautiful

Tatertots and Jello

Miss Mustard Seed

Back in the ICU

My dad is back in the ICU. I have started a Caring Bridge website for him and all my updates will post there. You can visit it at www.caringbridge.org/visit/bradbaldwin .

The next Heidi Klum...

Hayden has been absolutely cracking me up lately! Each morning when she wakes up I can hear her go to the bathroom, flush the potty, and then retreat to her bedroom for her daily ritual - the ritual of dressing herself in a head-to-toe outfit that is, um, special. Each morning she will walk into our bedroom and say "Momma, do you love it?!" Then I ooooh and aaaaah over her for a while. The next part of the ritual is that she asks me to get the camera so she "can do some poses". I am trying not to laugh hysterically as she is doing these poses. I swear, people, I have not taught her these! I have compiled some and I thought I would share her amazing fashion sense with you.

And my favorite....You better watch your back, Rachel Zoe. There's a new stylist in town. She tells me that feathered tiaras are all the rage right now.

The only problem with this daily occurance is that, in the process of picking out each amazing ensemble, the completely tears her room apart. She is flinging things out of drawers and baskets and pulling things off hangers.....I have completely given up on trying to keep it picked up.

Here are some pics of Hayden's room after I have picked it up and put everything in its place:

And here's what it looks like after she has completely destroyed it in search of the perfect pants, skirt, shirt, shirt to go over that shirt, socks, shoes, headband and bow to clip on the headband:I bet Heidi would never let her closet look like that.

Jumping on the burlap bandwagon...

It seems as though every home decorating, do-it-yourself blog I read is featuring projects done with burlap. I love everything I've seen and burlap is so cheap so you can do a lot of the projects inexpensively. I came across a tutorial here at Where The Heart Is for a burlap wreath and I knew I had to do it. I need a wreath for my door for all the months that don't have a specific holiday - something neutral that can work year round. I thought this would be perfect. It really was simple and easy to do. The steps are well outlined in the tutorial. I took the letter I had used on my Fall wreath and added for a little something extra. I think it works well with the toile fabric behind my door's window. If you are wanting to make a wreath for January, March (unless you actually have a St. Patrick's Day wreath), May, June, August, and September, give this one a try.

For other burlap projects, check out the sisters at Shanty2Chic. Those sisters love them some burlap and they know how to use it. Not every project uses burlap but tons of them do and you can get a lot of good ideas.

This picture says absolutely everything about why I wanted a dog...

While Hayden was doing treatments the other night, Tux got off of "his" chair and jumped up behind her to cuddle her. He's such a gentle and sweet boy.

It's been a roller coaster I never want to ride again

After my last cheerful post saying my dad was responding to treatment, things went downhill and fast. Aside from Hayden's birth and diagnosis, this has been the scariest week of my life.
The day after I wrote my last post, his lypase counts surged back up. They concluded that he must have a gall stone lodged in his common duct. What they didn't tell me or Mom at the time was just how serious it was becoming.
They told us on Wednesday morning that the gastroenterologist needed to take him for a procedure that would send a scope down past the stomach, through the intestines to the common duct where he could then remove the stone.
This is where my world fell apart in just a few minutes. The Dr. came back and told us he couldn't do it. Dad's insides were so swollen that he could get through the intestines. The stone was still there. He then told us that some of his lab work had come back and his kidneys were only functioning at 30%. His liver was becoming very jaundiced and he was turning yellow right before our eyes. His pancreas was in such severe condition that it was actually starting to feed on itself.
Within the hour we were talking to the new ICU doctor that had been assigned to Dad. He added to the list that his lungs were probably filling with fluid and that he was at an extreme risk for a blood clot in his lung. He looked us in the eyes and told us this was about as severe as it gets. His body was going through systematic organ failure.
Mom and I went into the hallway so we wouldn't upset dad and we cried into each other's arms. At one point I was practically hysterical. I just kept saying "I'm only 28. I still need my Daddy!". I could not imagine a world without my dad. Horrible things go through your head when you are put in this position.
He was immediately moved to the ICU where we were told he was their sickest patient. At this point, he had to get that stone out in order to get better but he was way too unstable and he never would have made it through surgery at that point. The ICU doctor later told Mom that he really thought we might lose Dad that night. I slept that night in a recliner in his room but I never really slept. I watched him like a hawk, watching his blood oxygen level on the monitor and praying he would make it through the night.
As soon as I could pull myself together I sent out messages on Facebook and started sending out prayer request email to practically everyone in my address book asking them to pray. And then amazing things started to happen. Over the past four days Dad started improving. His kidney function was improving (it's now 100%) and his jaundice started going away. He was able to go from needing 100% oxygen to only 45%. Numbers that needed to go down were going down and numbers that needed to go up were going up.
On the second day of Dad's improvement, the ICU told Mom that he couldn't believe the way he was improving. "There is no explanation for why he could be doing this well", he said to mom. "Yes there is", she said "There are people around the world lifting him up in prayer." "Well that has to be it then", he replied. He actually made enough progress that he was able to have his surgery today to remove his gall bladder, something they didn't think would happen for quite a while. They also think that "somehow" (prayer) the stone in his common duct wasn't lodged there anymore.
There were still risks with today's surgery. We were told that, because of his situation, he was at higher risk for heart attack or stroke during surgery and that it was very likely he would be on a respirator for a while afterward. None of those happened! They were able to remove that stinkin' gall bladder successfully and he came out of recovery with nothing more than a regular oxygen mask on his face.
We still have a long way to go. They need to do another test when his abdominal swelling goes down to make sure there aren't any other gall stones that escaped. They don't want another one making its way down to the common duct and starting this process all over again. Dad is probably looking at 1-2 months in the hospital based on how quickly he recovers and it will be about 6 months before he is fully healed and back to his old self.
Dad is truly a testament to the power of prayer.
The week before this happened I started a Beth Moore Bible study on Esther. It talks about God's providence and how, even in the times where you can't see Him you still know He is still there. It talked about how even though God has the power to reach down and create miracles on His own, He sometimes chooses to do His miracles through people down here on Earth. To me, those people are all the amazing doctor's who were helping Dad and all the friends and complete strangers who were praying everyday for him.
Do you think it was a coincidence I started that study days before this all happened? I think not.