First Day of Preschool!

Well, Hayden started preschool yesterday and I do happen to think that she looked completely adorable. The rosette trim you see on her shirt I have officially added to everything. The chocolate version is wrapping a lampshade in her room, the pink version and been on the edges of shelves, frames, the bottom of capris, etc. In other words, I think I am addicted to the rosette trim from Hobby Lobby. Anyhoo, here's my cutie, complete with odd new smile when saying "Cheese!" I had to do some reminiscing along the way.

Last year:

This year:Last year:This year:Ok, here's more pics from this year:

Here's Haydie with her "boyfriend" Austin:

God sent me to wear Badgley Mischka

Last Wednesday I drove down to Dallas for a new modeling job. Market was going on at the Dallas World Trade Center and my friend Cortney got me a job modeling in one of the largest showrooms down there. So Thursday through Sunday I wore designer clothes and four-inch heels for ten hours a day. It was very fun and a nice little break but VERY tiring. There are a lot of different designer lines within this one showroom and all seven of us models wore a bit of everything but, since I was the tallest, I wore mostly Badgley Mischka because their gowns are crazy long. This is me with the Badgley rep, Heather. I absolutely loved her. She would want me to let you know that the dress I'm wearing in this pic is NOT Badgley. If I remember correctly, she wasn't a fan of this dress.

She lives in Soho (NYC) so hopefully when I'm up there in a couple months I can see her. She said she'd tell me all the places I need to check out shopping wise. Yay!

This is our little changing closet. All of us changed in here together and it could get a wee bit cramped. It's a good thing we all really liked each other.

This is me wearing another unfortunate dress. Gee, what decade does this remind you of?
Here is a pic of me and model Hailey at dinner one evening at LaDuni (yum!) with another model, Erica's, fingers in front doing a peace sign. With this pic I mainly just wanted you to be able to see the supercute feather headband my mom got me at Steinmart. People, they have a million cute headbands right now. You must go.
Ahhhhh, finally some Badgley! Yeah, a "1,2,3" would have been nice so I would have been smiling instead of giving the camera a death glare but anyway....more importantly, this is Allison. Now I'm getting to the part where I explain why God put me in Dallas this past weekend and it wasn't really to wear Badgley, it was to meet Allison.

The very first morning of market all of us were sitting around some tables eating the catered breakfast in the showroom. I was the newbie so I was trying to get to know everyone. At some point Cortney (whom I already knew) was asking me for an update on Hayden's health and how she was doing. I could tell Allison was listening quietly and eventually she asked me "Why is your daughter doing breathing treatments?" I told her Hayden has cystic fibrosis and her mouth dropped open. "Both my siblings have CF!"

I could not believe it. There are only around 30,000 people in the entire nation with CF and here I come for a modeling job and meet a girl whose brother and sister have it!?! Even though Allison doesn't have the disease she has been affected by it her entire life. She was there when her siblings were going in and out of the hospital. She has worried about them along with her parents. She knew exactly what I was talking about when I rattled off all Hayden's medications. I was blown away. I fully expect to meet CF family members when I go to CFF events or conventions but the chances of this happening are slim to none and it blew me away.

Her brother is in his early 30s and her sister in her late 20s. They aren't doing super great but are doing as well as can be expected for their age, I guess. They have outlived what the life expectancy was when they were born. Her brother's lung function has unfortunately dropped to only 25% after getting the flu. He and his doctors are doing everything they can to bring that number back up.

God was completely a part of our meeting. For her, I think I was able to be someone who understands what her life has been. Her family really hasn't done much with the foundation so I don't know that she has had many people to talk to that get it...really get it. For me, she gave me something huge. She put a fear to rest that I never really even openly talk about. It's not even a fear over Hayden's health but about the people in her life.

Even now as I write this, I'm crying. Until the day it happens, I will have in the back of my mind that someday Hayden is going to realize she is different. She's going to realize that none of her friends have a vest, and three hours a day of treatments, and the other kids at school aren't taking pills before they eat. Someday I am going to have to tell that sweet baby that she has a disease. I, of course, won't put it that way but, the truth is, someday she will have to know. How I wish she could stay blissfully unaware of the differences between her and other kids. Right now it is fine. Right now the other kids don't think anything of it but the day will come when Hayden will be "different". The day will probably come where she won't want everyone to know she has CF.

Since the beginning, I have prayed for Hayden that God would bring special people into her life. I want her to find precious friends that will love her for who she is and completely support her. Friends that will never leave her out of a slumber party even though she will have to come with nebulizers and a vest. Friends that will make her feel just like everybody else and not "the sick girl". Hayden has so much to give and the thought that she would ever be left out or miss out on anything because of her disease kills me.

Not only was Allison able to tell me about the wonderful friends her brother and sister had growing up, more importantly she was able to tell me about the amazing wife and husband God brought to them. She and I both cried as she told me how their spouses were so supportive when they found out about their disease. They both said it didn't matter to them. They loved them for who they were and were in it for the long haul. For them, this means marrying someone who will spend most their time in the hospital. For them, this means organizing nebulizers and medications and doctor's visits 24/7. For them, they had to be willing to commit themselves to someone who might not have that much time left. Can you even imagine how special a person like this has to be? Someone who loves them NO MATTER WHAT. Someone who never once looked at them and saw a disease.

I have prayed for this person for Hayden. I know it's a long time from now but, as a mother, I worry. Something about talking to Allison and hearing the stories of her siblings' spouses brought me comfort. It wasn't a chance meeting. It was a meeting planned by God disguised as a modeling job. The Badgley Mischka gowns we were wearing were just icing on the cake.

There's a party on my eyelids!

Why is it that one little tube of eyeliner can make my day, scratch that, month sooooo much better? I don't know, but all that matters is-it does, thankyouverymuch. I have all but given up on potty training. Yes, Hayden is three and yes, she starts school in 22 days and yes, she is supposed to be potty trained to go to school. I GIVE UP! Oh, and if I hear from anyone else that says their kid potty trained in one day when the day they turned two I am going to scream in their face. Why do I only hear of these people?!?!?!? Where are all the other people whose kids are in total control of using the potty, know full well how to do it, have even decided on certain days that they are going to do it, but then go back to pooping and peeing in their underwear all the time because they just DO.NOT.WANT.TO potty train? Anyway, it has once again become a power struggle and I was loosing my mind so I have put her back in Pull-Ups for now until she decides she wants to do it. Sooooo, back to the eyeliner story. My sweet mom-in-law called me the other day when she knew I had already cleaned poop out of underwear three times by lunchtime (CF kids poop a lot) and told me she was coming over. She told me to get lost and gave me cash to go spend while I was out doing WHATEVER I WANTED ALL BY MYSELF. So, I know everyone will be shocked at this but...I went straight to the mall. I did not pass go, I did not collect $200, I marched myself right on up to the Clinique counter and bought a new lipstick. Already feeling better by this point, I went down to Victoria's Secret and got my FAVORITE (I'm all into using caps for effect in this post, if ya can't tell) new makeup item. Brown Glitter Liquid Eyeliner. Now I don't mean a subtle shimmer. I am talking ga-litter! But here's the thing: I doesn't look like I put something on my face I got at Limited Too (or Justice, whatever), when drawn in a thin line, it is still very grown up looking. It just happens to be way more fun than any other eyeliner you will ever own in your entire life. Because it has GLITTER in it and that just makes everything better, doesn't it?!? It does for me apparently. Because after that I was all prepared to go back home refreshed and ready to face however much poop necessary because I had new makeup. How can you be upset when you have a party on your eyelids? Well, you just can't.

Another cool thing about a short haircut...

The nap hair is quite impressive!

My baby is three!

Let me first start by saying that if I had known my hard drive would crash, sending my computer to the computer-fixer-man for a sweet forever, thereby leaving my last post up twelve days too long, I most certainly would not have written it about my acne! That being said, since it was up so long more of you left comments and I am happy to know that I am not the only female experiencing this freakish, probably hormonal, issuse in her late twenties. I have an appointment with the dermatologist on Wednesday so I'll share how that goes at a later date.

Anyway...I will back up on the posts after this one and share some other photos that have been taken in the past two weeks but today I had to share some of Hayden's 3-yr. portraits! They turned out sooooo good! Our friends Bill and Molly Crouch (bcpro.info) do photography and videography and Bill shot these both in their yard and down in Paseo (the arts district of Oklahoma City)in front of all the art galleries. I put a slide show at the bottom that has more of the pics in it. I'm pretty sure she looks more like a five-year-old than a little girl who just turned three and I'm also pretty sure that she's stinkin' adorable.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Ya wanna know what I bought myself for my birthday this year?

ProActiv. Yeah, as in the three-step acne system. Can someone please tell me why I am 28 and just now getting acne????? It is soooo great for the modeling career too, lemme tell ya. (I love how I say career as if standing around in clothes all day at a local store is a career. Anyhoo.)
I had the occasional zit in high school just like everyone else but for the most part I had good skin. Now? Every day there is a new hurty, inflamed bumb on my chin/jaw area! What up! So, I have been doing the three step system and I can tell it helps but then my skin is just flaking like crazy and I don't know how much better that looks than the bumbs. So I quit using EVERY step for a few days and used just one to two of them and BOOM, three new zits. Aggghhhhh! I also have to say that I look really sexy coming to bed each night with white refining mask covering every spot. Ryan could play connect the dots on my face each night for entertainment since there is no summer tv to watch. Yeah, that would be fun! Anyway, because I am vain I have been spending about 15 minutes of my morning routine carefully applying concealer to every little spot with a lip brush. MAC concealer, I don't know what I would do without you, you sweet little pot of magic. Has this happened to anyone else in their late twenties? Is it hormonal? Am I going to have to use the three-step system all the way up to menopause? Did I really just write an entire post about acne? Yes, yes I did.

I'm Baaaaaack!

Well, it wasn't necessarily intentional but I took about a month off from blogging. I usually blog before bed at night but lately I have been too pooped to do it! From May to July my little family has Mother's Day, my mom's bday, my bday, Father's Day, my husband's bday, our anniversary, Fourth of July and Hayden's birthday. Whew! Needless to say I've been busy. Even without all the celebrations and cake making we have been busy with school, gymnastics, planning for swim lessons that start next week, etc. I really don't know how those of you with more than one kid do it!

I'm going to show you pictures from Hayden's birthday party in a sec but first I want to show you pictures of her getting a "big girl haircut". Her hair is so wonky that I was straightening it everyday only to have it get stringy and gross looking within the hour. Sure I could pull it up but the second she sat in her car seat the back was messed up and my OCD just couldn't handle it anymore! I thought about getting her an angled bob cut a while back because it fits her personality to have a sassy 'do but I just couldn't do it. Well....we did it and it looks adorable! Here's the before:

And here's the after:

She loves it, if you can't tell from her facial expression. Now on to the party...

Her actual birthday isn't until this Sunday but since Saturday is July 4th I decided to have it the weekend before. It was a pony party! Our friends have miniature horses on their land and were sweet enough to offer to have Hayden's party at their house. It was very fun. The kids got to go in a pet, brush and feed the horses. We then had races with the stick ponies I had made as party favors. I will never do this again! Turns out it takes FOR-EV-ER to make 17 stick ponies. Oh well, they looked cute. After cupcakes and presents we ended with a horse pinata. Here are some pics...Hayden sat here to open her presents. Yes, I took the OCD to the next level and made her an outfit to match the party theme. I might have even cover a headband in bandana the night before for me to wear with my cowboy boots. It's an illness. It really is.

Each kid got a sherrif's badge after they raced. Everyone is a winner, of course, at a three-year-old's party.

Well, that's it for now. I probably won't get back to posting every day while summer's still going strong but I will definitely do my best to post as often as I can. Until next time...